Humbled by Friendship

I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships…particularly those that have exited my life. Some have drifted away like a dream you vaguely remember later in the morning and others veered sharply in an opposite direction leaving you to wonder how we could ever have been so close at a moment in time.

In my life, I had what I can only liken to the ice age of the dinosaurs, when suddenly all those around me were no longer and I found myself in a new city with no one. It felt lonely. Utterly lonely.

I spent nearly 10 years planting roots and building back a community filled with artists and lovers, sisters and healers. It was a renaissance of sorts for me. A time when I could rediscover the core of who I was by having an array of friendships mirror back to me aspects of all the things that comprise one human being.

In the quiet of my new home, I can sit still and appreciate the joy of true friendship and how much depth and meaning connection adds to life. When you find those to travel through life with you, despite circumstances and distance, it is a gift of immeasurable value. No amount of social networking can equal the pure energy of the human spirit shared over coffee, a hug, a movie, a meal, a kiss. Surely I’m stating the obvious. But as the silence permeates the air here, and I rake through Facebook hoping that a glance at a picture of fun times passed will satisfy my trip down memory lane, I know only to write this down as a way to remember to say thank you to those who’ve filled my life with love, unconditional love. Humbled.

Next…

It’s been quite some time since I had the time to write a few words. Of course, motherhood has been blissfully kicking my ass these last 6 months and Samiyah has slowly been teaching me the virtues of patience. Though not a surprise, everything else in life seems insignificant compared to the well-being of my baby girl. Still, I wasn’t fully prepared for how much of my life I would quickly change to accommodate this angel. Lack of sleep, quiet time, alone time, time with my instruments, time with my friends…these past 6 months have tested every fiber in my being about the Ego. Can I let it all go for something much larger then myself? I have come to learn that this larger gift is the experience of unconditional love.

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Life is beginning to just now resettle into a new rhythm that has space again for other joys. We’ve moved and in our new space comes a dedicated music studio. I look forward to stealing moments there again now that we’ve managed to get Mia to sleep through the nights. Of all the promises I’ve made to myself, nothing seems more important than the one I made when she was born – to commit my life to her in every way I can, including teaching her what it means to have passion and to dedicate yourself to something, to fight for the time to soak yourself in it.

I want Mia to know that anything worth anything in life is the thing that takes a lifetime of pursuit and exploration, the path you’re willing to spend quiet, intimate time with late at night while the rest of the world is sleeping so you can understand just a little bit more about it and your place on it.

So this is Next…balance again where music, love, motherhood, art, creativity, joy, friendship, family, inspiration all have their place in my heart and my day-to-day life for myself and for Mia.