last night i stayed home and had a date with music.  aside from an interview with soundtheory for radiophive, i sat with my guitar.  i’ve heard artists say that the life of a musician can be a lonely one, but i rather like the quiet times.  perhaps that’s a crucial part of being an artist - to be able to relish the solitude.  i ran across a quote i added to my dream book that should explain it all - "i’m never alone when i write."

at 6pm yesterday evening, i stood upon a soccer field with two women’s college soccer teams.  and for 1 and 1/2 minutes, there was complete silence except for me singing the national anthem.  a friend of mine told me "just don’t forget the words.  cuz it’s not a song.  it’s a poem about bombs and war and it just doesn’t make sense."  yeah, that may be, but then over 200+ years, we’ve attached so much meaning and emotion to the song.  i have never experienced reverence for a song coming through my voice.  it was humbling.

it gets me thinking about my role as a patriot.  perhaps that’s a discussion for another day.  i have been added to the circuit of anthem singers here in LA and recently was invited to sing for the mighty ducks v. l.a. kings national hockey game on september 30 here at the arrowhead pond.  i never expected to find myself in this role.  i’ve been remembering a lot of what a college professor once said in lecture - the utmost patriot is one that challenges its country and government in an effort to demand the highest ideals.  whether i’m ready or not, apathy is slowly losing its dark corner in my heart.

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i am not a very happy lady right now.  i am still on east coast time, but i’m back home in california.  i got up at 6:43am.  could not go back to sleep and now my eyes are burning a bit.  ay!

it’s been an interesting few months with a "debut album."  i am anxious to tour and get the word out.  i’m in production for my first two videos.  and this past weekend, i got a review by a british fellow named jon leonard.  his site is called leonard’s lair and he publishes reviews of 5 albums a week.  and while he had some good things to say about rock candy, he also mentioned that i’m someone to watch for in the future.

well…i thought, why aren’t i want to watch for now?  isn’t that funny!  in an instant, i had taken a very lovely sentiment and turned it around to fan my insecurities that i try so hard to keep under the surface.  but they’re there, simmering, just waiting for the chance to burn me even if only a bit.

when i sent the review link to jay (co producer), he said that he too was interested in seeing what i do next.  and i remember a reporter from east west woman asking me two weeks after the album was released if i had already started thinking about my next album because so many artists she interviews do that.

no.  actually, i hadn’t.  but maybe i should.  albums from conception to completion can take over a year.  with that thought and a few times hearing folks wonder about my creative future, i sat down last week and asked myself where do i want the music to take me and you in the next album?

there are no light bulbs going on in my head.  no sudden strikes of genius leading me to my next vision.  but i can start to hear the little voices offering suggestions, "what about this?  write about that?".  and i keep letting those voices know…i’m excited to tour with rock candy, but i promise to start thinking about album #2 during the quiet moments.  i just hope they aren’t always at 6:43 in the morning.

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